Rumor: LA Kings Will Ask Lakers To Borrow Lebron In Desperate Attempt To Save Failing Season

The Los Angeles Kings have been battling all season to not be the worst team in the NHL.  Currently at their wit’s end, a rumor is circulating that they are going to ask the Lakers if they can borrow Lebron to help boost their record and attendance.  Continue reading “Rumor: LA Kings Will Ask Lakers To Borrow Lebron In Desperate Attempt To Save Failing Season”

San Diego Padres Start GoFundMe to Help Pay For Manny Machado’s $300M Contract

In a desperate move to bring world-class talent to a talentless baseball club, the San Diego Padres offered star baseball player Manny Machado $300 million to swing a bat in Sunny San Diego.  The Padres, who are now looking deep into their clubhouse’s couch cushions for loose change, have also started a GoFundMe page to help finance Machado’s contract.  Continue reading “San Diego Padres Start GoFundMe to Help Pay For Manny Machado’s $300M Contract”

Bill Clinton Matches With Monica Lewinsky On Tinder And It’s Blowing Everyone Away

Reports have surfaced that Bill Clinton may be rekindling an old fire with someone he matched with on the popular dating site, Tinder.  Last week, Bill Clinton’s fateful right-swipe landed him on a date with Monica Lewinsky – an infamous character of Clinton’s past. Continue reading “Bill Clinton Matches With Monica Lewinsky On Tinder And It’s Blowing Everyone Away”

Cure Found For Trust Fund Babies Born With Small Penises

It’s a great day  if you’re a trust fund baby born with a small penis.  A groundbreaking cure is set to hit the market to treat Tragic Insufficient Penis Syndrome, commonly known as TIP Syndrome. TIP Syndrome effects 500,000 U.S. males of the nation’s top 1% wealthiest.    Continue reading “Cure Found For Trust Fund Babies Born With Small Penises”

Ku Klux Klan Member Is Kicked Out For Having DMX’s “X Gon Give It To Ya” Ring Tone

Billy Bob Anderson was a proud and active member of the Ku Klux Klan until one chapter meeting it all came to a dark ending.  The Klan was in the middle of discussing their next Trump Rally when Anderson’s phone went off, alarming everyone. Continue reading “Ku Klux Klan Member Is Kicked Out For Having DMX’s “X Gon Give It To Ya” Ring Tone”